


용기를 너무 늦게 내줘서 미안해

by ercique



Category: Infinite (Band)
Genre: M/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-02-22
Updated: 2017-02-22
Packaged: 2018-09-26 07:29:59
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings, No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,624
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/9873389
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/ercique/pseuds/ercique
Summary: lit. sorry for not having courage earlier(But he's also scared of knowing what all of this means. Both to him and Woohyun. So, he doesn't say anything.)





	

**Author's Note:**

> I'm so sorry I have no idea what this word vomit was about, probably a sad attempt on writing fluff. It popped up earlier after class and because Shan (@kaetseu) has been encouraging me to post this.

“ _Hyung_.” Woohyun whines. “How am I going to help if you won’t tell me what’s wrong?” He adds. Sunggyu sighs. He doesn’t even know what he got upset for anymore, but he would seriously appreciate having some time to himself.

“ _Hyung_ , I’ll kiss you for real this time if you still won’t smile.” Woohyun threatens. Sunggyu smirks, he’d like to see how far Woohyun would go. But he swears everything that came after was unintentional. He doesn’t know what made him froze, doesn’t know why Woohyun didn’t stop himself.

Woohyun's his best friend. Sure, they hugged to sleep before. But that was only because Woohyun loves cuddling and Sunggyu welcomes the warmth. That was what he told himself every time his conscience creeps up. He has never imagined them kissing. Or maybe he has. Sunggyu doesn't think he wants to know.

It was just a simple act, something that happens quite often. Sunggyu sulking over nothing and Woohyun threatening to kiss him if he doesn't smile. They're both completely sober that none of it is making sense to Sunggyu. But he stills. He didn’t turn away when he had the time to. Woohyun's lips feels light against his, almost psychedelic that Sunggyu wasn’t sure if it had actually happened. The next moment, Woohyun's gone. And for the whole week, they pretend it never happened. Sunggyu pretends he didn't see how flushed Woohyun was. He pretends he didn't notice his own cheeks burning. And the thought of Woohyun's lips on his was silenced before it could even surface.

 _It's stupid_ , Sunggyu thinks. He's stupid. But he knows whatever there is between them, shouldn't be there.

 

-

 

They were left alone that weekend. It doesn't take long before he has Woohyun's lips back on his. He has Woohyun's back pushed against the door to their room, and the way Woohyun moans so indecently into his mouth turns Sunggyu on. So much that it hurts.

_Wrongwrongwrong._

He knows he's not supposed to be doing this. Yet, he lets Woohyun press wet kisses on his neck. Sunggyu sees the dark in Woohyun's eyes. He lets his own hands roam under Woohyun's shirt. He's always liked girls. Yet, he's desperate. Desperate for Woohyun. He wanted to speak up, that it's wrong for them to be doing this. But he couldn't stop himself from wanting more. Woohyun shifts their position so that he's straddling Sunggyu, and all of his thoughts goes into flames.

 

-

 

Woohyun's kisses make his head spin. And Sunggyu is still debating if it's a good thing.

He knows they should talk about it. He also knows that it's wrong. Growing up, he's never been much exposed to anything that's out of the norm. He knows how the society would perceive him. And most importantly, how it would affect Infinite. But he's also scared of knowing what all of this means. Both to him and Woohyun. So, he doesn't say anything.

 

-

 

Sunggyu is panting as he tries to catch his breath. Woohyun's hands eager on the stretch of his boxer. More impatient tugs. That's when Sunggyu realized what he has to do.

"Woohyun." Woohyun looks up.

"I think we should stop doing this. Whatever this is." Silence. Woohyun then drops his hands to the side. "Okay."

 

-

 

It makes him mad seeing how easy Woohyun had relented. How easy it was for him to stop. Makes him even more mad that Woohyun's kisses are the only thing he thinks about still. He wonders if they're a kind of a narcotic in itself. An addictive.

But he pushes the thought away and resumes to their usual ways.

 

-

 

Sometime in between their hectic schedules, Sunggyu heard Woohyun talking about girls to Hoya in the backstage as a newly debuted girl group performs on stage. He feels a weird thud in his heart but he then decides to disregard it.

_It's none of his business, anyway._

 

-

 

It has almost been a year since then. They both dated and slept with girls along the time frame. Girls whom Sunggyu forgets their faces and names the morning after. It never mattered to him. And what relieved Sunggyu the most was how Woohyun remained his best friend. Someone who he could confide anything to. Someone who would always be there for him. He could always count on Woohyun and he knows that.

Occasionally though, he lets his mind wander and allows himself to think of the way Woohyun's lips feels soft on his, and how Woohyun's bare skin feels burns against his.

 

-

 

“ _Hyung_ , can you imagine a life without me?” Woohyun pops a random question.

They’re at a club, celebrating the end of their second world tour. Sunggyu looks to one side, sees Hoya and Sungjong dancing on the platform. Across Sunggyu, Dongwoo and Myungsoo are immersed in playing a game Myungsoo invented and by how drunk Myungsoo is right now, Sunggyu assumes Dongwoo is winning. He chuckles.

At that time, Sungyeol slams an empty glass to the table. Usually Sunggyu would tell him to stop drinking but he let it slide this time. For the nth time, Sungyeol shoves the empty glass to Woohyun. He has been trying to get Woohyun to join him for the last twenty minutes. Woohyun. Sunggyu looks to his side, Woohyun. Woohyun, who’s looking slightly flushed but not drunk. Then Sunggyu remembers hearing Woohyun asking him something before his mind wanders.

“Sorry, what?” He tries projecting his voice over the loud music. Woohyun laughs. “Can you imagine a life without me?” He repeats.

“No.” Sunggyu doesn’t have to think for him to know the answer. It’s out there for everyone to see.

Woohyun smiles, Sunggyu feels a twinge.

“I can’t imagine a life without you, the members, without Infinite.” He adds.

Sunggyu thinks he sees Woohyun’s smile falters a bit but he pretends not to see. He knows no one gets him like Woohyun does and no one gets Woohyun like he does. But it isn’t as easy as that. It hurts him but they must not repeat their mistake. Before his mind could wonder if it was really a mistake, Sunggyu quickly grabs his glass and demands for another drink.

 

-

 

It was sometime in summer, when even the nights are warm. It’s 2 _am_ and they're out on the rooftop because they couldn’t sleep. Sunggyu takes out a cigarette and lights it up. " _Hyung_ , you really should stop smoking." Woohyun stands next to him. Both facing the busy streets of Seoul, the heavy layer of smoke clouding over them. "It really is bad for your health." Woohyun continues when Sunggyu doesn't reply. He sighs. "I know." He takes a few more drag before he lets the burnt out stick falls to the ground.

"Please stop. You know I love you." Woohyun says. Sunggyu feels his heart quickening. "Yeah, you say that all the time." He replies, trying to sound casual.

"Because I mean it." Woohyun is staring into his eyes now and Sunggyu finds it difficult to think of a reply.

"I love you too. You know that." Sunggyu reaches for Woohyun's arm and gives a light squeeze, averting his gaze back to the city.

"I'm pretty sure I love you more." Woohyun's voice resounding deep inside his veins.

"What makes you think so? Loving someone might be more subjective than you think." Sunggyu reasons, keeping his head down.

“Because it’s past two, I’ll tell you.” Sunggyu figures Woohyun might have sounded a little too lightheaded than usual. "I know you love me, _hyung_. I’m your best friend. But that's about it." Woohyun takes his calculated pause.

"How is it any different than you loving me?" Sunggyu challenges. He feels his barraging heart beats, silently anticipating the uncertain.

"I still kind of want to sleep with you, that kind of love. The I want you to kiss me kind of love. Do you get the difference now, _hyung_?" Woohyun speaks, his eyes not leaving Sunggyu.

Sunggyu is silent. His thoughts a resemblance of utter chaos. He doesn’t think he could hold back when Woohyun is saying things like that to him. He decides _to hell with everything else._ That the only thing that should matter is that they love each other. Sunggyu then wraps his arms around Woohyun's waist, pulling them close so they're flushed against each other.

"Really?" He is now staring into Woohyun's eyes. Beautiful, everything about Woohyun has always been beautiful.

"Yes." With that, Sunggyu think it’s okay to allow himself to forget any self constraint he had. He kisses Woohyun, relishing in the taste he had missed so much, only pulling away when they're both out of breath. The smile Woohyun has on his face is sufficient for the amount of reassurance Sunggyu needs. So, he matches it with one of his own.

 

-

 

He woke to Woohyun stirring in his sleep, he then turns to the side to check the time. It’s almost five, the sun will be out soon. Next he focuses on Woohyun. He wonders why he never noticed how pretty Woohyun’s eyelashes are. He suppresses a chuckle, because then again, everything about Woohyun is pretty. He figures he loves all of Woohyun. Smiling to himself, he presses a kiss to Woohyun’s forehead.

Woohyun stirs again. This time, he brings one hand to his eyes, rubbing them together. “What time is it?” Woohyun asks as he yawns, messy hair and voice hoarse. Sunggyu thinks he looks cute. “It’s only five, you can go back to sleep.” Sunggyu whispers. Woohyun then turns to face him, putting one arm on Sunggyu’s waist.

“Woohyun.” Sunggyu hums low. “Sorry for not having courage earlier.” He smiles when he feels Woohyun’s grip on his waist tightens, as he lets his eyes flutter close before drifting back to sleep.

 

**Author's Note:**

> I like comments, so leave one!


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